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Find Your Strength In Love......

While working in my studio, I set my Pandora station to Whitney Houston and for the first time since I sang with my church choir in the 5th grade, I  really listened to the words of "The Greatest of All". Fast forward......while working I kept singing (attempting to sing, lol) ......." find your strength in love......."
Of course many years have passed and the song has a much different meaning........I have learned a lot obout strength, circumstance and love. And of course, I must share!!!!! lol!!!!

Finding your strength in love can not be done without first, loving yourself.  Accepting your self and all of your flaws, knowing that you can change anything for the better, no matter what it is.  Loving yourself first means not compromising what you really feel.  Otherwise you operate and make decisions based on an untruths and the outcome you are going to get is pretentious, because that's what you gave....In this world, you get back what you put out!!!

Be positive in your thoughts. Make it a habit to celebrate the good in you.Acknowledge your best efforts and be grateful of the things you have accomplished in life. 

Stop criticizing yourself and berating yourself.  Every one makes mistakes, but remember its not in your fall, its in your get up!!!!

Stop worrying.  YOU CAN NOT CONTROL EVERYTHING.  Do what you can and surrender the rest.  There is no pill, no drink, no drug, no sip, no food, no person that you can turn to that can solve your problems....When you are finished with the above, the problem is still there, while you have added another uncompromising issue.

Be forgiving and generous to yourself first.....

 

When you love you first, you value your own opinion first and your are unihibited by what others think. WHEN you don't love you first, the opposite occurs. The question is, what do you say about you!?!?!? and what ever the answer  is, if you don't like it FIX IT!!!!

I decided long ago, never to walk in anyone's shadows
If I fail, if I succeed
At least I'll live as I believe
No matter what they take from me
They can't take away my dignity
Because the greatest love of all
Is happening to me
I found the greatest love of all
Inside of me
The greatest love of all
Is easy to achieve
Learning to love yourself
It is the greatest love of all......that's your strength!!!!

(picture me singing this to you....) FIND YOUR STRENGTH IN LOOOOOOOVVVE

...( OH YEAH, I HIT THE HIGH NOTE!!!)

XOXOXOXOXO

Silly of Me

Electric Blue Jeans Philthy Ragz
Black and White Tunic Philthy Ragz
Black Cropped Jacket Philthy Ragz
T-Strapped Pumps Sam Edelman 

Did you know that original meaning of silly meant happy or blessed?  Ever since I was a little girl, my family called me silly, my uncle used to tell me that when I walked into the room my personality just had a way of brightening up wherever we were, and made people laugh, when truth be told, I wasn't  trying to!

I was just naturally being me! But little did they know that I was actually in a painful place.  At school daily I used to get teased about my forehead ( as you can see, its pretty bold!) the gap in my teeth and the "weird" way that I dressed. Although all of the kids around me would laugh and tease me saying mean and hateful jokes and I would hate it, but suffer in silence, because I knew no one at home would understand.  I knew they would just say toughen up, it doesn't matter what people say, and just shrug it off, because of course I'd heard that thousands of times, right?!! lol

In hindsight, my soul had its own way of bringing light during any situation,  I didn't understand that I truly had the ability to create my own happiness.  I didn't realize I had this bounce back kind of thing going on at such a young age and my that my "silliness" was my own way of bringing inner peace and  joy,  It  was what helped  me to continue to get up and face challenges every day.  Through challenges that I thought were monumental at the time, I had this kind of skill that we all need to use today, that NO MATTER WHAT,  I AM GOING TO HAPPY!!! I AM GOING TO ALWAYS HAVE  CHALLENGES, BUT I CAN STILL BE HAPPY!!!

To this day people still call me silly, but now I don't mind! Now I hold onto the original meaning of the word, blessed and happy.  I hold in my heart that the very things I thought I would not be able to endure, the teasing  about my look and the way i dressed, are the very backbone to a thriving business today! 

So wherever you are, whatever your doing and whatever you are facing, create your own happiness.....The situation will still be there and  people are still going to talk regardless, but don't let that steal your joy. Stolen Joy equals stolen power. And as my uncle said, shrug it off and keep it pushing, you still got to do what you got to do!!!

"Happiness is not a matter of good fortune or worldly possessions. It's a mental attitude. It comes from appreciating what we have, instead of being miserable about what we don't have. It's so simple?yet so hard for the human mind to comprehend." - Bits and Pieces

"I am still determined to be cheerful and happy, in whatever situation I may be; for I have also learned from experience that the greater part of our happiness or misery depends upon our dispositions, and not upon our circumstances."  - Martha Washington

xoxoxoxoxoxo

Make 'Herstory'

Red Tails inspired outfit. Striped pencil dress Philthy Ragz Boutique, Laced front  Booties Jeffrey Campbell

Had the pleasure of watching one of the best movies I have seen in a long while.  I’d heard mixed reviews, some talks about the actors, some talks about the script, and some talks about the directing.  All in all, I must say that I thoroughly enjoyed the movie, not only because of my race, but because of the appreciation for the message both in front of and behind the film, respectively,  two different perspectives.

BOSS Bracelet. BCBG

Military jacket, hubby's closet!! ssssshhhhh...lol!

The fond appreciation for the film, stems from both being an entrepreneur and a black woman. In my seven year stint of entrepreneurism, I have found the key ingredient for  growth and success is  having the courage to stand against all odds  firmly, patiently  and consistently and to be  committed to the cause, especially, when surrounded by doubt and disbelief. The absence of the above are the catalysts to lost dreams and empty vision, but when executed properly, they are the keys to making history, your story. Calculated risks, developing and sustaining the ability to forecast your own future, are what create legends, like the Tuskegee Airmen.

Leopard top, Philthy Ragz Boutique

Jeweled tone jeans are the one of the hottest trends for spring summer 2012! 

 The message must prevail over the numerous amounts of times folks give up after a few tries of an idea and the desired acclaim or fortune are not immediate.  Quite often jumping off of one thing and on to the next! All throughout history, the noted legendaries are those who defy the odds, those who smelled the doubt and disbelief brewing, yet still went for the kill,   continuously in pursuit of the goal despite the naysayers and the economic forecast.  In the making of The Red Tails, the filmmaker, the plot, as well as the story of the journey to create the film, screamed this kind of success. 

Hat and handbag, thrifted.

Shoes. ASOS

It should be a message for all of us to replay.  Against all odds, live fearlessly, effectively and purposefully, make 'herstory' by being committed  and driven without being fearful of taking risks!  soooooooooooo......Suit up, buckle up and get ready for take off!!!!! 

Food for thought:  five frogs were sitting on a log when one of them decided to jump off. Can you guess how many were left sitting on the log? Five frogs— because deciding to jump doesn’t mean jumping!

Spike It Up! Body, 'Sole' and Spirit!

Christian Louboutin

Sam Edelman

With the New Year fully up and going, it’s time to really get it going for ourselves.  Let’s just face it, what’s the point of merely, just living.  Too often we wait on circumstances to be PERFECT before we make moves to spice up our lives.  We are waiting for the perfect amount of money, the perfect amount of weight loss, the perfect man, and the perfect woman, the perfect whatever! 

Jeffrey Campbell, (my favorite shoe designer!!)

Zigi Shoes

The time is now spice (spike) it up!  Truth is, that with whatever you want to do, where there is a will there is a way, no matter how much money, time or talent!

Jeffrey Campbell

Jeffrey Campbell

Be spontaneous, seize opportunities as they present themselves to you, how do you know you can, if you don’t.  Don’t make excuses, you know the ones….”I’m to this, I’m to that, and I don’t have anything to wear”…... the list goes on and on.  This is the kind of life that turns into the shoulda coulda woulda’s. It’s that time now and it begins in the mind first, and you must believe that YOU DESERVE IT!!

Betsey Johnson

As a woman, mother, wife, entrepreneur, designer, blogger and stylists, I have been guilty of it all! I find it most difficult to relax! I can be somewhere and my mind soul, body and spirit is really not there.  My mind is always on the next thing, and I found it terribly difficult to be in the moment.  I have even left an event, thinking, what the hell just occurred!? Lol! I was physically present but mentally absent.

Sam Edelman

Kyle Platform Pump

Jeffrey Campbell

"Spike" up your life up with the seasons most dangerous weapons, the spiked shoe, and try at least 5 of the following ways to spike or spice up your life!!

1. Don't make excuses.

2. Be spontaneous.

3. Do the unusual.

4. Spice up your attitude. Be open minded.

5. Be fully present and in the moment.  Unless you have superpowers, you can only be in one place at a time, so enjoy!

6. Know that you deserve to feel good. 

7. Do something different from what every one expects.

8. Change an element in your environment. (designate a room and do small things like change a color of the wall and then go and  buy accents, like pillows, vases or curtains to coordinate the look)

9.  Do something for YOURSELF!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

10.  GO QUICKLY and get a pair of these spiked heels, and fashionably kick some ass!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! LOL!!!

Tata for Now,

The Retail Therapyst

p.s. sooooooo....... I'm  Spicing up my life by taking a zumba and a salsa class!!! anyone know of any good ones?.......

The Retail Therapyst: How Big Was your Last Deposit?

The Retail Therapyst: How Big Was your Last Deposit?: Today I had a very long conversation with one of my best girlies in the whole world. During our conversation, I took my friend to my ne...

How Big Was your Last Deposit?

Today I had a very long conversation with one of my best girlies in the whole world.

During our conversation, I took my friend to my new work studio and she happily turned around and told me that I had inspired her.  This took me by surprise because I felt the same way but I don’t think she ever knew it! After she left, I began to reminisce about how I met her.  Our relationship began five years ago when she was a customer at my boutique, and the very first time we met we talked for hours and haven’t stopped talking since then... LOLOL!!

Five years ago our first interaction  happened to come at a time when I had just opened my boutique and it was tough!!! I will never forget the three words that she uttered to me, “don’t give up”! I was speechless, asking myself, How did she know? All I could do is shed tears, but some how I felt the tug to keep trying.

As our sister hood strengthened, a  few years later, she challenged me to go beyond the normal way I did things and try something new.  She invited me to participate in a fashion show amongst some top notch designers.  Nervous, but fearless, I did it! The new way of doing things changed my brand forever. Her subtle nudge forced me to step outside of my comfort zone.

Have you ever met that one someone who said that one thing that changed you whole world?  You never know how much taking the time to encourage someone, can change their whole world.  We have to treat relationships like we do our banking; decrease the amount of withdrawals, and increase the deposits!! 

Shirt dress. Philthy Ragz
Shoes JC Penny's
Tube dress. DIY
Sunglasses. Steve Madden
Earrings, Ear Rehab
Bangles, Philthy Ragz

This was the first dress I designed after a nudge of "Gay, you can do it! just try it...."...and this was before the Marc Jacobs dress was premiered!!!

INCREASE YOUR WORTH, 

MAKE THOSE DEPOSITS!!!

Xoxoxoxox

The Retail Therapyst!

The Retail Therapyst: Walking on Sunshine

The Retail Therapyst: Walking on Sunshine: color block tee, Philthy Ragz. electric blue blazer,Philthy Ragz, white maxi with split, Philthy Ragz. You are my sunshine My only ...

Walking on Sunshine

color block tee, Philthy Ragz. electric blue blazer,Philthy Ragz, white maxi with split, Philthy Ragz.

You are my sunshine
My only sunshine
You make me happy
When the skies are grey
You'll never know dear
How much I love you
So please don't take
My sunshine

Remember that song????……When I was a little girl, I used to love to hum the lyrics.  Little did I know about what sunshine really was? As a young girl, when I thought of sunshine I was over joyous because it meant being able to play hopscotch or ride my bike (only to the corner, granny didn’t play that! Lol) outdoors, wearing my pedal pushers and tying my shirt up in the front thinking I was cute!

Beaded sandals, ALDOS.

As a woman of a certain age, sunshine has such a different interpretation. Sunshine is equated with joy; it has this strange way of dictating our moods, and determining what our day’s accomplishments will be!  In all actuality, sunshine has power!!!  In so many words if we don’t have sunshine, many of us don’t have joy…….If you don’t have joy, you don’t have power,….if you u don't have power, you lack the ability to conquer! There is strength in joy.

Beautiful Los Angeles, sunset.!!!! only in Los Angeles, (in January!!!lol)

When you are joyous, your aura permeates the effervescence of power and productivity and attracts everything positive. In essence, if something or someone takes away your sunshine or your joy, they have taken away your power……   so clear yourself of anything toxic.  Over time it takes away your sunshine….and without joy, you give control away….The sun has set on those days!

 Remember only what you feed is only what’s going to grow…….

.

Basking in the Sunshine,

The Retail Therapyst

xoxoxoxoxoxo